In this blog I’ve often written about my ongoing battle in dealing with ego issues. Despite this, today I find myself needing to write about this topic yet again. I suppose that’s not really surprising, seeing as this great adventure upon which I have embarked is all about moving out of the ego and into the heart, in my quest to discover my true purpose.
A few years ago my partner and I went on holiday to a lovely eco-friendly resort in the Tsitsikamma forest (no surprises there!) At the reception we were signed in and given the key to our cabin by a sweet old man with an unkempt beard and shaggy hair, dressed in an ancient baggy pair of trackpants, filthy bare feet and a jersey that had egg down the front. Surprisingly we felt an immediate connection to, and affinity with, this person. We assumed that he was one of the workers at the place, however the following day we met him again, working on one of the electrical boards. He was at great pains to inform us that he had been the founder and CEO of a large corporate company which he had sold for an astronomical sum of money, with which he had developed the resort, after he had tired of the corporate world. At the time I found this interaction very sad on 2 counts: firstly, we had assumed that he was simply a worker because of the way he was dressed and secondly, he had needed to inform us that he was actually someone of value and importance by telling us his history. Three egos fully engaged! Why did any of this matter to us at all? Why had we not all simply acknowledged the fact that there was an instant rapport and explored this to mutual benefit?
Have you noticed that most social interactions (particularly when we meet someone new) are actual permutations of a sort of egoic “pissing contest”, as we subtly (or sometimes not so subtly!) try to establish our rank in the social hierarchy by ensuring that all present are aware of our qualifications, titles, sporting prowess, knowledge, intelligence or other forms of rank (including looks and sexual appeal)? Have you also noticed that, whenever someone else in the room is operating from his or her ego, the urge to move into one’s own ego is particularly powerful?
I had decided that I would resist the urge to inform people of the rank I had previously held once I had embarked upon my new life. However, recently I have had to confront the fact that all the old ego inducements are as powerfully seductive as ever:
My partner has taken responsibility for the selling of our home. As such, he has had to deal with all the estate agents and people wanting to view our property. The agent who finally succeeded in selling our home obviously decided that I was just the “little lady”, of very little importance or value, as all her business dealings had been with my partner. She speaks to me in a very patronizing and pedantic fashion, as if I were an idiot child. Every time I am with her I find myself wanting to create an opportunity to work into the conversation the information that I have 4 degrees, that I have, until very recently, managed a highly successful business and that I’m actually someone with a working brain!
Why should it matter in the slightest what a service provider thinks of me? If she wants to earn her commission, she will do her job irrespective of whether she thinks I’m someone important or not. Why do I feel this need to have someone, who is of absolutely no long-term importance in my life, validate my existence? After all, I have CHOSEN to give up my impressive job title, my fancy car, my personal banker and all the other trappings of success. How can I be upset to be dismissed as someone of no real value if I CHOOSE to wear tracksuits, cargo pants, ponytails and no make-up instead of power suits and heels?
I guess we all have a box in our minds into which we put all of our concepts of Self that we develop over the course of our lives, such as:
I am a successful businessperson
I am a wife
I am a parent
I am highly educated and intelligent
I have style and great taste
I am organized and on top of everything
I am attractive and sporty
Etc, etc
And then we feel the need to defend these concepts of Self against any perceived threat, which is exactly what I was feeling in my dealings with the estate agent. But, what happens if we lose some of these Self-concepts (either willingly, as I have recently done), or if they are taken away from us? Well, let’s see…
If you take away my job, my possessions, my status, my money, will I still be me? Very few of us would particularly relish the thought of losing all these things, but, as someone who has willingly given up several of these things, I can confidently say, yes, I am definitely still me. How about if, in addition, you take away my relationships, my youth, my health, my strength, my freedom? I would obviously hate losing all those things, but I would certainly still be me. The reality is that sooner or later ALL of these things will either be “taken away” from us or we will willingly give them up – we simply can’t hold onto them forever (mainly because we don’t actually live forever!) OK, so how about if you take my body away from me (ie: you kill me)? Would I still be me? For myself, I don’t believe that I am my body. I HAVE a body and if you take it away, I will still be me, forever unchanged.
If I become really quiet and go within, I find that there is a part of myself that is, and always has been, unchanged and unchanging; the part of me that is the silent observer of my own life; a spark of consciousness that is untouched by the drama, the illusion of this life. This is the part of me that is eternal, that can never be taken away from me and requires absolutely no validation whatsoever in this illusory world.
I think there is a fascinating ambiguity that I need to learn to hold in my mind - the fact that I am both an actor in the movie and the screenwriter, both the author of the book and a character in the book. And once I understand myself to be both the creator and the experiencer of my reality, I am free to enjoy all the wonderful experiences this illusory reality can offer me, while still remaining aware that I am so much more than this. Then, I can consciously use my ego as a tool for the purpose to which it is best suited, namely, to go forth and create things to experience in the world, rather than to use it for that to which it is not suited, ie: to create my concept of Self. I think the ego is a wonderful tool, if used in service to the heart.
So, next time I feel a powerful urge to start telling someone about how important I used to be, I am going to stop, take a deep breath and move into an awareness of my true, eternal Self. Then I will be able to look with compassion and listen intently to what the person in front of me really requires from me in this moment. I will be able to see this moment for what it truly is: not a threat to my sense of Self, but rather an opportunity to create a higher version of myself and, thereby, a more magnificent reality.
And so the journey continues…
Next: Why the forest?
Friday, March 19, 2010
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Self-sufficiency
After weeks of discussion, debate, and intensive research, we have finally made the decision that we will indeed be creating a completely self-sustaining home on our piece of ground outside Knysna. Well, actually that’s stretching the truth just a little bit, as we will still be buying some necessities such as toilet paper and olive oil, but we will be self-sufficient with respect to water, energy, waste management and will grow most of our own food requirements. This was a daunting concept before we started doing the research, but it’s even more daunting now that we know exactly what will be required! However, it makes sense to us to “go green” from the very beginning rather than trying to gradually implement it afterwards. This means that we will be designing our new home from scratch to be as energy-efficient as possible, with self-sufficiency in mind. Below is a list of just some of the systems we will be installing:
- A solar heated geyser
- Solar panels and battery array for electricity requirements
- A rainwater collection and pump system
- A grey water treatment system and storage tank, linked to a drip irrigation system for our vegetable garden (no more Jik, Handy Andy or Sunlight liquid – only biodegradable, environmentally friendly options permitted)
- A small black water system for the kitchen sink
- A complete recycling system for paper, metal, glass, plastic and organic material comprising hatches in the kitchen, linked to chutes and bins in the basement (there is no garbage removal in the forest!) We do anticipate that we will be generating far less waste than we currently do, as our food will mostly be provided by our garden rather than by the corner Woolies and we will be reusing containers.
- Compost heaps and a worm farm
- Composting loos (we simply cannot justify the wastage of precious water resources required for a flushing loo, but, I must admit, this decision was very difficult for me to take)
- Solar-powered electrified fencing to protect the veggie garden from baboons
- An aeration and biofilter system for the dams to ensure the water doesn’t get stagnant or become a mosquito breeding ground and also to ensure the survival of the fish we will be growing for another protein source
Of course all this infrastructure is rather costly and hence the house we are building will be a really simple timber home, with a focus on optimal layout and efficiency. We have considered the possibility of building a packed earth house or even using recycled material to build the home, but I guess that’s where I put my foot down. I’m not particularly keen on living in a Hobbit-house or a rabbit hutch! I really want my home to be both beautiful and functional and I’ve always had a romantic attachment to the idea of a timber cottage in the forest.
The good part about all this is that, once the systems are installed and operational, we will have very minimal further input costs, other than routine maintenance. As we will be actively involved in the installation process, we will ensure that we understand how the systems operate so as to reduce our dependence on outside contractors for maintenance services in future.
I have also been planning my veggie garden and learning all about companion planting and intercropping and pest management strategies so as to ensure that we can grow 100% organic veggies.
This is becoming a very exciting and rather frightening adventure, as we venture ever further down the self-sufficiency rabbit hole. But those who know us well will not be at all surprised to discover that we aren’t particularly good at doing things by half-measures!
Our home has now been sold at a very good price. We are pleased that we held out and were not tempted to reduce the price in order to make a quicker sale. We plan to visit the property in Knysna within the next few weeks to start engaging with the builders and the suppliers of all the systems we require so as to do a complete detailed costing and project plan. We will probably be moving to the guest cottage on the neighbours’ land within the next 2 months so as to commence the building of our dream.
And so the journey continues..
For those interested – a quick update on Twiggy the stick insect:
Twiggy stayed with us for about 3 months. For a while she was joined by another smaller stick insect that we named Stalky. We thought that perhaps the insect grapevine had spread the word about the stick insect Utopia in our home and that we could expect to have an ever-increasing colony of stick insects taking up residence in our house.
But no, Twiggy was merely training her successor. After about 5 days Twiggy disappeared and we have not seen her since (we suspect she has subsequently moved on to stick insect heaven), but now Stalky has taken up residence in the ivy in the jug on the bedstand. So, Mother Nature has insured that we always have insect company. At night, when the lights are out, Stalky starts to feed. You would be amazed to hear how noisy stick insect mandibles pulverizing ivy can be! How privileged we are to experience this.
Next: Ego Revisited
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Going with the flow
When I was a kid I had absolutely no sense of having any limitations. I was supremely confident and I simply never doubted for a second that I would be able to excel at anything to which I had set my mind. And so it was! People used to remark that I was “charmed” because it really seemed as if I could do anything whatsoever that I chose to do. I used to have a feeling, which I can still remember vividly from so many years ago. It was a feeling of being “in the flow” of things. I wasn’t trying or fighting or struggling – I simply decided to do something that looked like a fun thing to do, and then I did it – excellently! I didn’t have any ego or arrogance about being excellent, nor did I believe that I was somehow special or different. I never really thought about those things. If anything, I suppose that I believed this was simply the natural way for things to be - for me to be. And actually I was rather detached from the outcome of the things I set out to do. The prizes and awards were really very unimportant (and sometimes rather embarrassing!) to me. I suspect it was more about the process of doing things that were fun and interesting rather than achieving any desired outcome or the resultant accolades.
But somewhere in my teens I started to attach my ego to the things I accomplished; it started to become important to me to achieve, and to receive affirmation and recognition for achieving. And that is exactly the point at which life started to become more of a struggle for me. Things that had previously seemed effortless now took a whole lot more effort and energy and became difficult to achieve. In fact, I even started to attach my ego to the fact that I was able to accomplish things that were considered a challenge. However, self-doubt and fear that perhaps I would not achieve the standards and therefore the recognition that I desired, also started to manifest.
As an adult my ego-reality had become that I had to work really hard and long hours and show a whole lot of dedication, perseverance and resourcefulness and then I would achieve most of what I had set out to achieve. But, even when I achieved my goals, my elation was always tinged by a whisper of fear that perhaps next time I would not be able to achieve the same success. After all, you’re only as successful as your last deal, right? Life is just an ongoing struggle, isn’t it? Well… I’m not so sure of either of these statements any more!
Lately I’ve been asking myself whether life really needs to be a continual exhausting struggle or whether there is another way of being. Is it possible to recapture that feeling of effortlessness, of being in the flow, which I remember from my childhood? Wouldn’t it be great to have fun in the moment and really enjoy the process rather than obsessing about the outcome all the time?
These questions are particularly pertinent to me as I am experiencing the transition from an egocentric mode of being to a more heart-centric mode of being. My heart tells me to set my intent and then to relinquish attachment to the outcome and simply be present, enjoying the NOW. My ego tells me this is absolute BS! How will anything ever be accomplished without constant, focused attention to detail and endless driving? The difficulty is that the reason I now have the luxury of 2 years in which to find my purpose and to express my heartsong is that I have been rather successful at the egocentric mode of being! And when something has really worked very well, it is extremely difficult to give up on it and try something else. Particularly when the pressure increases (for example when our house is taking longer to sell than we had anticipated or when I contemplate the endless to-do lists required to move from the city to the country).
Of course we all know that when the stress levels increase, we tend to fall back on the old coping mechanisms, so, I have found myself applying all the strategies and techniques that have enabled me to be a success in the corporate world to my transition to the forest. And, to be perfectly honest, it’s simply not working! Which is hardly surprising, if one thinks about it for a minute. How can I be in my heart if my ego is forever trying to micro-manage every single detail of this transition? The reality is that all I am doing is causing a whole world of pain and suffering for myself, as I get increasingly frustrated and annoyed when things aren’t working out according to the schedule and plan, as set by my ego.
But, when I do relinquish control, bring myself present to this moment NOW and simply allow things to be what they are, then suddenly… miraculously… things start to fall into place. Suddenly the impossible is completely do-able. Suddenly I start to see the absolute perfection of the way things are working out, which is: far more joyfully and perfectly than my limited ego-plan would have been able to engineer.
I suspect that it is simply a choice between whether to struggle and suffer and work myself to a standstill or whether to stand back, view the whole picture and stay open to the miraculous. If I am unable to see the perfection of this moment now, then perhaps I am simply standing too close to the picture? Doesn’t it make a whole lot more sense to relax and remain in the flow rather than to struggle and fight for ego-control?
So, here’s how I think it works for me. I very clearly set my intent as to what I want by using my imagination to visualize the desired outcome, spending time on imagining the way I would feel if it were already true and accomplished. Then, I take care of the minimal admin (doing) that is required for it to happen, relinquish control and attachment to the outcome and sit back and enjoy the ride. And, amazingly, miracles ensue.
And they truly do. Since taking the decision to create my reality in this fashion, our house, which has been on the market for 4 months, has sold at a really great price and several other long-outstanding elements of our new life have fallen effortlessly into place, often in delightfully surprising ways. In addition, I’m feeling far more relaxed and having far more fun this way.
Of course I always have the choice to make my life a difficult struggle, but I think I would prefer to take life, and myself, far less seriously. What about you?
Next: Self Sufficiency
But somewhere in my teens I started to attach my ego to the things I accomplished; it started to become important to me to achieve, and to receive affirmation and recognition for achieving. And that is exactly the point at which life started to become more of a struggle for me. Things that had previously seemed effortless now took a whole lot more effort and energy and became difficult to achieve. In fact, I even started to attach my ego to the fact that I was able to accomplish things that were considered a challenge. However, self-doubt and fear that perhaps I would not achieve the standards and therefore the recognition that I desired, also started to manifest.
As an adult my ego-reality had become that I had to work really hard and long hours and show a whole lot of dedication, perseverance and resourcefulness and then I would achieve most of what I had set out to achieve. But, even when I achieved my goals, my elation was always tinged by a whisper of fear that perhaps next time I would not be able to achieve the same success. After all, you’re only as successful as your last deal, right? Life is just an ongoing struggle, isn’t it? Well… I’m not so sure of either of these statements any more!
Lately I’ve been asking myself whether life really needs to be a continual exhausting struggle or whether there is another way of being. Is it possible to recapture that feeling of effortlessness, of being in the flow, which I remember from my childhood? Wouldn’t it be great to have fun in the moment and really enjoy the process rather than obsessing about the outcome all the time?
These questions are particularly pertinent to me as I am experiencing the transition from an egocentric mode of being to a more heart-centric mode of being. My heart tells me to set my intent and then to relinquish attachment to the outcome and simply be present, enjoying the NOW. My ego tells me this is absolute BS! How will anything ever be accomplished without constant, focused attention to detail and endless driving? The difficulty is that the reason I now have the luxury of 2 years in which to find my purpose and to express my heartsong is that I have been rather successful at the egocentric mode of being! And when something has really worked very well, it is extremely difficult to give up on it and try something else. Particularly when the pressure increases (for example when our house is taking longer to sell than we had anticipated or when I contemplate the endless to-do lists required to move from the city to the country).
Of course we all know that when the stress levels increase, we tend to fall back on the old coping mechanisms, so, I have found myself applying all the strategies and techniques that have enabled me to be a success in the corporate world to my transition to the forest. And, to be perfectly honest, it’s simply not working! Which is hardly surprising, if one thinks about it for a minute. How can I be in my heart if my ego is forever trying to micro-manage every single detail of this transition? The reality is that all I am doing is causing a whole world of pain and suffering for myself, as I get increasingly frustrated and annoyed when things aren’t working out according to the schedule and plan, as set by my ego.
But, when I do relinquish control, bring myself present to this moment NOW and simply allow things to be what they are, then suddenly… miraculously… things start to fall into place. Suddenly the impossible is completely do-able. Suddenly I start to see the absolute perfection of the way things are working out, which is: far more joyfully and perfectly than my limited ego-plan would have been able to engineer.
I suspect that it is simply a choice between whether to struggle and suffer and work myself to a standstill or whether to stand back, view the whole picture and stay open to the miraculous. If I am unable to see the perfection of this moment now, then perhaps I am simply standing too close to the picture? Doesn’t it make a whole lot more sense to relax and remain in the flow rather than to struggle and fight for ego-control?
So, here’s how I think it works for me. I very clearly set my intent as to what I want by using my imagination to visualize the desired outcome, spending time on imagining the way I would feel if it were already true and accomplished. Then, I take care of the minimal admin (doing) that is required for it to happen, relinquish control and attachment to the outcome and sit back and enjoy the ride. And, amazingly, miracles ensue.
And they truly do. Since taking the decision to create my reality in this fashion, our house, which has been on the market for 4 months, has sold at a really great price and several other long-outstanding elements of our new life have fallen effortlessly into place, often in delightfully surprising ways. In addition, I’m feeling far more relaxed and having far more fun this way.
Of course I always have the choice to make my life a difficult struggle, but I think I would prefer to take life, and myself, far less seriously. What about you?
Next: Self Sufficiency
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Why do anything?
I have been thinking quite a bit lately about what motivates me to do the things I do.
I have read over-and-over that there are only two real motivators, one being fear and the other being love. I know that fear used to be a very strong motivator for me in the past. I feared that, if I didn’t perform according to certain criteria, if I didn’t exceed my budget, if I didn’t have the car, the house the possessions, if I wasn’t a “nice”, sweet person who “massaged” the egos that counted and conformed to societal expectations, then I would not receive the recognition, affirmation, acceptance, ie: “love”, from society that I craved. The roles that I have chosen to play in the past have all been aimed at being told that I was acceptable and therefore worthy of love (because, of course, I feared that I was neither). This fake “love” is like fast food for the ego, but it always left me feeling hungry for more. Addictive and not at all satisfying or truly nourishing.
We learn from a very young age that there are certain behaviours that are rewarded by the giving of love and treats, whereas there are other behaviours that are discouraged through the withholding of love or the infliction of punishment. This conditioning continues into adulthood. When we play socially sanctioned roles, we are rewarded in the form of approval (respect, acceptance, status, power), money, possessions etc. so that we will continue to play these roles for the maximum utility of the corporation, the family, the society or whatever other institution requires our acquiescence. When we behave contrary to what is required by the institution, we are “punished” by the withdrawal of the aforementioned tokens of approval.
If we view society as an organism that is principally concerned with its own survival, then it makes perfect sense for society to strongly dis-incentivise its members from engaging in anti-social behaviours such as murder, rape, theft etc. It also makes sense to strongly incentivise people to devote their time and energy to activities that support the prevailing ideology and maintain the status quo and to discourage ideas, belief systems and activities that threaten it.
I suppose that we all have, to a certain extent, the choice whether to support and participate in these institutions or not and there’s nothing wrong with this at all, if we are very clear about the transaction that is taking place. As individuals of course we require (or believe we require) certain things from society such as security, infrastructure, community, a sense of meaning and purpose, and in exchange we are prepared to offer our acquiescence to the prevailing “way of being”. For me (and others, I suspect) the problem comes in when we mistake the rewards we receive for our acquiescence for love, and when we become dependent on this substitute “love” for our sense of self or well-being.
But how to distinguish between true love and the fake substitute? Well, for myself, I have come to the realization that true love accepts and rewards me for simply BEING myself in every moment, whereas substitute or fake love rewards me for DOING what the institution wants me to do. I have also realized that no expression of love from a source external to myself is ever going to feel completely satisfying unless I have found true love for, and acceptance of, myself. And then, ironically, I no longer require any external expressions of love at all!
But, coming back to love or fear as a motivator; actually I suspect that most of the things we choose to do are motivated by a combination of love and fear. For example, the motivators for sending my child to the most expensive private school could be a combination of the following: I love my children and want what’s best for them, I fear that unless they have the best education they will not have a secured future, I fear I will be considered a bad parent if I don’t send them to the most expensive school, I fear my children will come to resent me and eventually reject me if I don’t give them the very best, I love to see my children happy, secure and adjusting to life in a good school, etc, etc.
I am currently in the fortunate position of having very little that I absolutely MUST do (other than eating, sleeping and maintaining basic standards of hygiene!) It is actually very interesting to observe what it is that I choose to do in this position. Fear is playing a virtually non-existent role as a motivator right now. I guess it is love that is currently motivating me to keep simply choosing to do that which brings me the most joy and personal satisfaction. When viewed from the outside, I’m definitely not doing a whole helluva lot! I have never, in my whole life, been so blissfully indolent.
I suspect that I am merely pupating at the moment. Even though the caterpillar in the cocoon appears to be completely immobile and doing absolutely nothing at all, a miracle is taking place, which will reveal itself when the butterfly finally emerges. Hopefully, in due course, I will emerge from my own cocoon of inactivity as a whole new being with a great deal of purpose and fully energized to contribute my best and most meaningful gifts to the world.
And so the journey continues…
Next: Going With the Flow
I have read over-and-over that there are only two real motivators, one being fear and the other being love. I know that fear used to be a very strong motivator for me in the past. I feared that, if I didn’t perform according to certain criteria, if I didn’t exceed my budget, if I didn’t have the car, the house the possessions, if I wasn’t a “nice”, sweet person who “massaged” the egos that counted and conformed to societal expectations, then I would not receive the recognition, affirmation, acceptance, ie: “love”, from society that I craved. The roles that I have chosen to play in the past have all been aimed at being told that I was acceptable and therefore worthy of love (because, of course, I feared that I was neither). This fake “love” is like fast food for the ego, but it always left me feeling hungry for more. Addictive and not at all satisfying or truly nourishing.
We learn from a very young age that there are certain behaviours that are rewarded by the giving of love and treats, whereas there are other behaviours that are discouraged through the withholding of love or the infliction of punishment. This conditioning continues into adulthood. When we play socially sanctioned roles, we are rewarded in the form of approval (respect, acceptance, status, power), money, possessions etc. so that we will continue to play these roles for the maximum utility of the corporation, the family, the society or whatever other institution requires our acquiescence. When we behave contrary to what is required by the institution, we are “punished” by the withdrawal of the aforementioned tokens of approval.
If we view society as an organism that is principally concerned with its own survival, then it makes perfect sense for society to strongly dis-incentivise its members from engaging in anti-social behaviours such as murder, rape, theft etc. It also makes sense to strongly incentivise people to devote their time and energy to activities that support the prevailing ideology and maintain the status quo and to discourage ideas, belief systems and activities that threaten it.
I suppose that we all have, to a certain extent, the choice whether to support and participate in these institutions or not and there’s nothing wrong with this at all, if we are very clear about the transaction that is taking place. As individuals of course we require (or believe we require) certain things from society such as security, infrastructure, community, a sense of meaning and purpose, and in exchange we are prepared to offer our acquiescence to the prevailing “way of being”. For me (and others, I suspect) the problem comes in when we mistake the rewards we receive for our acquiescence for love, and when we become dependent on this substitute “love” for our sense of self or well-being.
But how to distinguish between true love and the fake substitute? Well, for myself, I have come to the realization that true love accepts and rewards me for simply BEING myself in every moment, whereas substitute or fake love rewards me for DOING what the institution wants me to do. I have also realized that no expression of love from a source external to myself is ever going to feel completely satisfying unless I have found true love for, and acceptance of, myself. And then, ironically, I no longer require any external expressions of love at all!
But, coming back to love or fear as a motivator; actually I suspect that most of the things we choose to do are motivated by a combination of love and fear. For example, the motivators for sending my child to the most expensive private school could be a combination of the following: I love my children and want what’s best for them, I fear that unless they have the best education they will not have a secured future, I fear I will be considered a bad parent if I don’t send them to the most expensive school, I fear my children will come to resent me and eventually reject me if I don’t give them the very best, I love to see my children happy, secure and adjusting to life in a good school, etc, etc.
I am currently in the fortunate position of having very little that I absolutely MUST do (other than eating, sleeping and maintaining basic standards of hygiene!) It is actually very interesting to observe what it is that I choose to do in this position. Fear is playing a virtually non-existent role as a motivator right now. I guess it is love that is currently motivating me to keep simply choosing to do that which brings me the most joy and personal satisfaction. When viewed from the outside, I’m definitely not doing a whole helluva lot! I have never, in my whole life, been so blissfully indolent.
I suspect that I am merely pupating at the moment. Even though the caterpillar in the cocoon appears to be completely immobile and doing absolutely nothing at all, a miracle is taking place, which will reveal itself when the butterfly finally emerges. Hopefully, in due course, I will emerge from my own cocoon of inactivity as a whole new being with a great deal of purpose and fully energized to contribute my best and most meaningful gifts to the world.
And so the journey continues…
Next: Going With the Flow
Friday, February 19, 2010
Creating my own reality?
Lately one often hears people say that we create our own reality. This idea was probably seeded into general consciousness by movies such as “The Secret” and “What the Bleep do we know”, but perhaps it is simply a concept whose time has come. Perhaps our consciousness has sufficiently matured that we are finally able to entertain such an idea. Recently, as a result of certain experiences I have had (more about these later), I have been wondering what exactly it means to create my own reality.
Science tells us that our thoughts and emotions lead to the production of various chemicals in our brains and bodies, which do, indeed, impact on our physical experience of our reality. Just thinking about something, or imagining it, engages the same parts of the brain (as can be clearly observed by scientists), and leads to exactly the same physiological response, as actually experiencing that event in reality. So, if I think of someone I love, I will experience the same cascade of feel-good chemicals in the brain that I would experience if that person were actually physically with me. Positive thinking leads to the production of brain chemicals that cause us to feel happy and positive and vice versa. So, we really are able to influence our own subjective, physical experience of reality through our thoughts and intent. But what of the external reality that we experience with our five senses? I’m of the opinion that this too, is 100% a subjective experience.
We know that we are bombarded by thousands of bits of information every second, of which we are only consciously aware of a tiny percentage. What determines which bits of information we actively experience? Well, all information is filtered through the lens of our own view of the world and ourselves, which, in turn, is created by our previous experiences and our thoughts and attitudes about those experiences. So, if we hold a certain worldview, we will continue to have experiences that confirm and support that worldview, and our brains will disregard those bits of information that don’t actively support our worldview. Someone with a totally different worldview would experience exactly the same circumstances very differently. We know this is true when we interview several people who all witnessed an event but recall vastly different versions of that same event.
In truth we don’t experience the world the way IT is, but rather the way WE are.
Our experience of reality can never be truly objective at all, but is a totally subjective experience, which would seem to suggest that we could dramatically alter our experience of external reality if we were to alter ourselves. And how do we alter ourselves? Well, we alter our thinking, which leads to an alteration of our emotional state (we can eventually learn to “self-emote”, which means that we choose how we will feel about something rather than simply being a victim to our emotions). This, in turn, leads to an alteration of our physiological state, which alters our physical experience. Changing our thinking clearly changes the lens through which we filter the information we receive through our 5 senses, which, in turn, also alters our experiences and so on and so on, either in an upward spiral of self-perpetuating and self-reinforcing positivity or in a downward spiral of self-perpetuating negativity.
There is a school of thought that posits that our entire experience is subjective, which means that the whole of reality plays out in my own mind and that all reality is therefore a projection of my own consciousness. Therefore, I am 100% responsible for my own experience of all reality. We can combine the subjective worldview with the “many worlds" theory (or parallel universe theory) given to us by quantum physics, which suggests that, at every event, reality branches into all possible options, which all continue to co-exist. In this combined theory, I truly choose, in every moment, through my thoughts and intent and consciousness, exactly which version of reality I am going to experience. This would seem to indicate then that I choose which version of YOU I am going to experience, indeed, which version of all reality I am going to experience. This is indeed, the strongest version of the “I create my own reality” thesis. I’m not sure I’m prepared to accept this version as yet! However, I am pretty sure that, on some level or other, we do create our own experienced reality.
Of course, in order to benefit from the knowledge that we can create our own experiences of reality, we have to relinquish our attachment to our belief that we are victims and embrace our true creator-selves. And that’s the hardest part of all. It’s SO much easier to think of ourselves as helpless, weak, passive beings, victimized by fate or God or by society or our parents or whatever, than to take full responsibility for the creation of our own reality. Do I have the courage to stand up and take ownership of my life, my experiences, my emotional state, and my self-created reality? Well, I guess that, by applying the principles explored above, then I need to choose to have the courage, think and believe that I have the courage and then my reality will start to reflect that I DO have the courage. And so it is…
OK, this is all very interesting theory, but what have my own experiences in this regard been? Well, I have been working on investing my energy in the things I DO want rather than the things I don’t. What this means in practice is that I spend time every day in meditation and contemplation in which I vividly imagine what it is that I want to create in my life. I visualize this in great detail and I start to imagine the way I would feel if this was the way things were. Remembering that imagining the event causes EXACTLY the same physiological response as actually experiencing the event and that this physiological response then starts to alter my experience of reality. Then I express my willingness to be the version of self that experiences this new reality and get on with my life, staying open and receptive to pick up on “route markers” along the way. These could be an intuition that I should go somewhere, do something, talk to someone etc. Or often they come in the form of a strong emotion, which tells me that I am on the right path.
These are essentially the techniques described in greater detail in “The Secret”, but they are immensely powerful and also unbelievably effective. The world I am experiencing is starting to change. I keep meeting people and having experiences that confirm my opinions about the way I choose to see the world. I am happier and calmer and more in touch with what I really want than ever before. I am starting to experience incredible synchronicity, as I miraculously find myself in the right place at the right time to experience that which moves me ever closer to my stated intent. Below is an example of this.
I wrote last week Friday about the property we had found (link to last Friday's blog posting here) and certainly, at the time, it appeared to meet all the criteria we had intellectually set for our forest retreat. But then, on Saturday, we experienced something truly miraculous. We had agreed to meet with the estate agent to view one last property before we left for Cape Town. We were a bit reluctant to do so, as we thought that we had already found the perfect place for us. But she had gone to so much effort to set up the appointment that we felt bad about canceling and so we decided to quickly have a look and then leave.
Now, I need to backtrack a bit to something that happened 18 months ago. After the “peak experience” I had on the forested hilltop (described in my first blog post), I started to imagine what my new life could be like in the Tsitsikamma forest. I would lie awake at night imagining driving up a densely forested driveway in a white pick-up and pulling up in front of a wooden home, surrounded by indigenous forest. I imagined living a self-sufficient life, collecting rainwater, growing our own food and spending the rest of my time expressing my authentic Self in a way that brought me a sense of meaning and purpose. These imaginings brought me a great sense of joy, excitement and anticipation. However, as the months passed, my attention was diverted by the busy-ness of disentangling myself from my corporate job and city life and I forgot about my imagined perfect forest home.
Well, on Saturday, as we were following the estate agent in our car along an 8km dirt road winding its way through indigenous forest to the piece of land we were to view, suddenly there was a CLICK and I realized that I recognized this place! It was EXACTLY the way I had imagined it all those months before and, when we walked onto the piece of land, I knew that I had been there before in my vision. I had an overwhelming emotional connection to the place. Without knowing any of the practical considerations with respect to the property, I knew I was home!
This property is surrounded by protected indigenous forest with views of forest-covered mountains, as far as the eye can see. It has 2 dams, which had plenty of water despite the drought and is mostly cleared of invader species (although some work will still be required). We would need to build our own timber home to our own specifications (in my vision I saw the timber home we will build). There is plenty of space for a vegetable garden. Our neighbour, who is selling the property, owns a helicopter, which is put into use whenever there are fires in the Tsitsikamma forests. A useful connection to have! Even better, he has a guest cottage on his property where he has offered us accommodation while we are building our own home. He is also moving towards complete self-sufficiency and even shares our beliefs and philosophies, which we discovered during an hour spent chatting to him after viewing the property. Several of the other people in the small community appear to have similar ideas. We start to see the possibility of being part of the creation of an intentional community based on shared vision and values, which is something that we have often spoken and dreamt about. Every detail is simply perfect. This IS our new home.
So, did I create this reality through my intent or is it simply a huge coincidence? Was it prescience or did I predispose myself to finding this property because of the energy and emotion with which I imbued my imaginings? I guess I have a choice to see it any way I wish and therefore I choose to believe that I do indeed create my own reality and that my experience provides me with confirmation of these views. I choose to believe this simply because it makes me feel happy. My daily experiences are increasingly providing me with more and more reasons to believe as I do. And, really, at the end of the day, I choose to trust my own experiences rather than anyone else's theories or opinions.
What I have realized is that my emotions are the key the creating my reality. When I strongly imbue a thought or vision with emotion, I generally find that vision fulfilled in my reality and when I feel a really strong emotional response to something, then I know that I am on my true path. My heart is my infallible guide.
So, we have put in an option to buy the land and tomorrow we will be receiving an offer to purchase our home in Cape Town, and all is progressing perfectly in fulfilment of our dreams.
And so the journey continues…
Next: Why Do Anything?
Science tells us that our thoughts and emotions lead to the production of various chemicals in our brains and bodies, which do, indeed, impact on our physical experience of our reality. Just thinking about something, or imagining it, engages the same parts of the brain (as can be clearly observed by scientists), and leads to exactly the same physiological response, as actually experiencing that event in reality. So, if I think of someone I love, I will experience the same cascade of feel-good chemicals in the brain that I would experience if that person were actually physically with me. Positive thinking leads to the production of brain chemicals that cause us to feel happy and positive and vice versa. So, we really are able to influence our own subjective, physical experience of reality through our thoughts and intent. But what of the external reality that we experience with our five senses? I’m of the opinion that this too, is 100% a subjective experience.
We know that we are bombarded by thousands of bits of information every second, of which we are only consciously aware of a tiny percentage. What determines which bits of information we actively experience? Well, all information is filtered through the lens of our own view of the world and ourselves, which, in turn, is created by our previous experiences and our thoughts and attitudes about those experiences. So, if we hold a certain worldview, we will continue to have experiences that confirm and support that worldview, and our brains will disregard those bits of information that don’t actively support our worldview. Someone with a totally different worldview would experience exactly the same circumstances very differently. We know this is true when we interview several people who all witnessed an event but recall vastly different versions of that same event.
In truth we don’t experience the world the way IT is, but rather the way WE are.
Our experience of reality can never be truly objective at all, but is a totally subjective experience, which would seem to suggest that we could dramatically alter our experience of external reality if we were to alter ourselves. And how do we alter ourselves? Well, we alter our thinking, which leads to an alteration of our emotional state (we can eventually learn to “self-emote”, which means that we choose how we will feel about something rather than simply being a victim to our emotions). This, in turn, leads to an alteration of our physiological state, which alters our physical experience. Changing our thinking clearly changes the lens through which we filter the information we receive through our 5 senses, which, in turn, also alters our experiences and so on and so on, either in an upward spiral of self-perpetuating and self-reinforcing positivity or in a downward spiral of self-perpetuating negativity.
There is a school of thought that posits that our entire experience is subjective, which means that the whole of reality plays out in my own mind and that all reality is therefore a projection of my own consciousness. Therefore, I am 100% responsible for my own experience of all reality. We can combine the subjective worldview with the “many worlds" theory (or parallel universe theory) given to us by quantum physics, which suggests that, at every event, reality branches into all possible options, which all continue to co-exist. In this combined theory, I truly choose, in every moment, through my thoughts and intent and consciousness, exactly which version of reality I am going to experience. This would seem to indicate then that I choose which version of YOU I am going to experience, indeed, which version of all reality I am going to experience. This is indeed, the strongest version of the “I create my own reality” thesis. I’m not sure I’m prepared to accept this version as yet! However, I am pretty sure that, on some level or other, we do create our own experienced reality.
Of course, in order to benefit from the knowledge that we can create our own experiences of reality, we have to relinquish our attachment to our belief that we are victims and embrace our true creator-selves. And that’s the hardest part of all. It’s SO much easier to think of ourselves as helpless, weak, passive beings, victimized by fate or God or by society or our parents or whatever, than to take full responsibility for the creation of our own reality. Do I have the courage to stand up and take ownership of my life, my experiences, my emotional state, and my self-created reality? Well, I guess that, by applying the principles explored above, then I need to choose to have the courage, think and believe that I have the courage and then my reality will start to reflect that I DO have the courage. And so it is…
OK, this is all very interesting theory, but what have my own experiences in this regard been? Well, I have been working on investing my energy in the things I DO want rather than the things I don’t. What this means in practice is that I spend time every day in meditation and contemplation in which I vividly imagine what it is that I want to create in my life. I visualize this in great detail and I start to imagine the way I would feel if this was the way things were. Remembering that imagining the event causes EXACTLY the same physiological response as actually experiencing the event and that this physiological response then starts to alter my experience of reality. Then I express my willingness to be the version of self that experiences this new reality and get on with my life, staying open and receptive to pick up on “route markers” along the way. These could be an intuition that I should go somewhere, do something, talk to someone etc. Or often they come in the form of a strong emotion, which tells me that I am on the right path.
These are essentially the techniques described in greater detail in “The Secret”, but they are immensely powerful and also unbelievably effective. The world I am experiencing is starting to change. I keep meeting people and having experiences that confirm my opinions about the way I choose to see the world. I am happier and calmer and more in touch with what I really want than ever before. I am starting to experience incredible synchronicity, as I miraculously find myself in the right place at the right time to experience that which moves me ever closer to my stated intent. Below is an example of this.
I wrote last week Friday about the property we had found (link to last Friday's blog posting here) and certainly, at the time, it appeared to meet all the criteria we had intellectually set for our forest retreat. But then, on Saturday, we experienced something truly miraculous. We had agreed to meet with the estate agent to view one last property before we left for Cape Town. We were a bit reluctant to do so, as we thought that we had already found the perfect place for us. But she had gone to so much effort to set up the appointment that we felt bad about canceling and so we decided to quickly have a look and then leave.
Now, I need to backtrack a bit to something that happened 18 months ago. After the “peak experience” I had on the forested hilltop (described in my first blog post), I started to imagine what my new life could be like in the Tsitsikamma forest. I would lie awake at night imagining driving up a densely forested driveway in a white pick-up and pulling up in front of a wooden home, surrounded by indigenous forest. I imagined living a self-sufficient life, collecting rainwater, growing our own food and spending the rest of my time expressing my authentic Self in a way that brought me a sense of meaning and purpose. These imaginings brought me a great sense of joy, excitement and anticipation. However, as the months passed, my attention was diverted by the busy-ness of disentangling myself from my corporate job and city life and I forgot about my imagined perfect forest home.
Well, on Saturday, as we were following the estate agent in our car along an 8km dirt road winding its way through indigenous forest to the piece of land we were to view, suddenly there was a CLICK and I realized that I recognized this place! It was EXACTLY the way I had imagined it all those months before and, when we walked onto the piece of land, I knew that I had been there before in my vision. I had an overwhelming emotional connection to the place. Without knowing any of the practical considerations with respect to the property, I knew I was home!
This property is surrounded by protected indigenous forest with views of forest-covered mountains, as far as the eye can see. It has 2 dams, which had plenty of water despite the drought and is mostly cleared of invader species (although some work will still be required). We would need to build our own timber home to our own specifications (in my vision I saw the timber home we will build). There is plenty of space for a vegetable garden. Our neighbour, who is selling the property, owns a helicopter, which is put into use whenever there are fires in the Tsitsikamma forests. A useful connection to have! Even better, he has a guest cottage on his property where he has offered us accommodation while we are building our own home. He is also moving towards complete self-sufficiency and even shares our beliefs and philosophies, which we discovered during an hour spent chatting to him after viewing the property. Several of the other people in the small community appear to have similar ideas. We start to see the possibility of being part of the creation of an intentional community based on shared vision and values, which is something that we have often spoken and dreamt about. Every detail is simply perfect. This IS our new home.
So, did I create this reality through my intent or is it simply a huge coincidence? Was it prescience or did I predispose myself to finding this property because of the energy and emotion with which I imbued my imaginings? I guess I have a choice to see it any way I wish and therefore I choose to believe that I do indeed create my own reality and that my experience provides me with confirmation of these views. I choose to believe this simply because it makes me feel happy. My daily experiences are increasingly providing me with more and more reasons to believe as I do. And, really, at the end of the day, I choose to trust my own experiences rather than anyone else's theories or opinions.
What I have realized is that my emotions are the key the creating my reality. When I strongly imbue a thought or vision with emotion, I generally find that vision fulfilled in my reality and when I feel a really strong emotional response to something, then I know that I am on my true path. My heart is my infallible guide.
So, we have put in an option to buy the land and tomorrow we will be receiving an offer to purchase our home in Cape Town, and all is progressing perfectly in fulfilment of our dreams.
And so the journey continues…
Next: Why Do Anything?
Friday, February 12, 2010
Paradise found!
I’m writing this from Paradise. Well, my version thereof anyway!
We’ve spent the last 6 days viewing a myriad of diverse properties in the Garden Route, from Wilderness to Tsitsikamma, in search of the perfect place from which to create our forest dream. As the days have progressed, our dream has steadily come more-and more sharply into focus. In the process I have realized a few things about myself.
Firstly, I am DEFINITELY not a farmer! The hours spent inspecting an assortment of farm dams, traipsing through whitefly-infested citrus orchards, hectares of invader species that would require endless clearing and maintenance, pastures of silage or tracts of thorny “braam bos”, all the while sagely nodding my head in a vain attempt to create the impression that I understood what I was being told, have certainly made this fact abundantly clear to me! We have also decided that any property larger than 5 ha is simply too much for us to cope with and have accepted the sunburn, scratches, insect bites and twisted ankles as “school fees” before gratefully abandoning any delusions that we might have been harbouring of becoming “gentlemen farmers”. Our time is far better spent in other, more lucrative pursuits better suited to our talents and interests.
Similarly we have accepted that 100% self-sustainability might not be for us; at least not for a while until we have had time to gradually ease ourselves into the lifestyle – I definitely don’t have the courage to go cold turkey on my creature comforts! We visited several people who are attempting to be self-sustaining and, one look at the extremely challenging, not to mention bloody exhausting, existence they are attempting to scratch out of their dusty pieces of earth made me realize that, although I am willing to forgo the malls, my sporty car and other luxurious trappings of city life, I am certainly not willing to give up on essentials such as a daily shower, lights, a flushing loo, a washing machine and sufficient quality food to eat. I just can’t see myself fighting a daily battle with the baboons in order to harvest enough food to keep body and soul together!
We also considered some lovely eco-village propositions. Here the idea is to live with as small a footprint as possible and to use eco-friendly materials and building technologies in the construction of one’s home; however there is still Eskom-provided power and running water although most people do collect rain water and supplement with solar power. These eco-villages are situated in very beautiful, remote places, often in nature conservation areas, which would seem, on the face of it, to be absolutely perfect for our needs. However there are problems with the keeping of domestic pets and there are many, often extremely onerous, rules with respect to what one may and may not do. Suddenly it all felt very restrictive and not really conducive to our dream of having sufficient freedom and space to do our own “thing”.
We looked into residential properties within developments where the “country-feel” is maintained; a sort of rural “lite” solution for reforming city slickers! Some of these have incredible views and include communal use of small tracts of indigenous forest. But, at the end of the day, one is restricted to a small piece of land (measured in square metres instead of hectares!) and there are limitations to the freedom of expression and movement through voluntary subjugation to the dictates of a “body corporate”. Had we wanted this, we could simply have relocated to the outskirts of Cape Town.
So, the solution appeared to be a smallholding that had the right mix of indigenous flora, with enough space to breathe and sufficient autonomy but with acceptable security and at least Eskom power.
Well, we may just have found it! A 4.2ha property 5km from Plettenburg Bay; down a 400m gravel road. It has its own piece of >3ha of indigenous forest and fynbos and a 1,200 m2 piece of cleared land in front of the house, absolutely perfect for a large herb and vegetable garden and there is plenty of space for fruit trees along the driveway. There is a charming, large, well-maintained 3-bedroomed house on the property and a 2-bedroomed cottage in the indigenous forest, complete with tame loeries that appear every morning for their breakfast of fruit. Rainwater is collected in 6 large tanks but Eskom power is connected. Grey water is collected and can then be pumped onto the vegetable garden. Views are of the distant mountains, covered in pine forests, our own valley filled with indigenous forest and neighbouring dairy farms. None of the surrounding farmland may be subdivided or developed, as it is outside of the urban limits. There is space to breathe, space to develop and space to grow our dream. And, best of all, it is considerably cheaper than the asking price for our little “yuppy-pad” in Cape Town! Now, all that remains is to very rapidly conclude the sale of our Cape Town property and to make an offer. Even if we miss out on this property, we have been able to clearly articulate what we are looking for and we have seen that what we are looking for does indeed exist at a reasonable price.
This all very exciting! Our dream is finally starting to take shape.
Next: Creating My Own Reality
We’ve spent the last 6 days viewing a myriad of diverse properties in the Garden Route, from Wilderness to Tsitsikamma, in search of the perfect place from which to create our forest dream. As the days have progressed, our dream has steadily come more-and more sharply into focus. In the process I have realized a few things about myself.
Firstly, I am DEFINITELY not a farmer! The hours spent inspecting an assortment of farm dams, traipsing through whitefly-infested citrus orchards, hectares of invader species that would require endless clearing and maintenance, pastures of silage or tracts of thorny “braam bos”, all the while sagely nodding my head in a vain attempt to create the impression that I understood what I was being told, have certainly made this fact abundantly clear to me! We have also decided that any property larger than 5 ha is simply too much for us to cope with and have accepted the sunburn, scratches, insect bites and twisted ankles as “school fees” before gratefully abandoning any delusions that we might have been harbouring of becoming “gentlemen farmers”. Our time is far better spent in other, more lucrative pursuits better suited to our talents and interests.
Similarly we have accepted that 100% self-sustainability might not be for us; at least not for a while until we have had time to gradually ease ourselves into the lifestyle – I definitely don’t have the courage to go cold turkey on my creature comforts! We visited several people who are attempting to be self-sustaining and, one look at the extremely challenging, not to mention bloody exhausting, existence they are attempting to scratch out of their dusty pieces of earth made me realize that, although I am willing to forgo the malls, my sporty car and other luxurious trappings of city life, I am certainly not willing to give up on essentials such as a daily shower, lights, a flushing loo, a washing machine and sufficient quality food to eat. I just can’t see myself fighting a daily battle with the baboons in order to harvest enough food to keep body and soul together!
We also considered some lovely eco-village propositions. Here the idea is to live with as small a footprint as possible and to use eco-friendly materials and building technologies in the construction of one’s home; however there is still Eskom-provided power and running water although most people do collect rain water and supplement with solar power. These eco-villages are situated in very beautiful, remote places, often in nature conservation areas, which would seem, on the face of it, to be absolutely perfect for our needs. However there are problems with the keeping of domestic pets and there are many, often extremely onerous, rules with respect to what one may and may not do. Suddenly it all felt very restrictive and not really conducive to our dream of having sufficient freedom and space to do our own “thing”.
We looked into residential properties within developments where the “country-feel” is maintained; a sort of rural “lite” solution for reforming city slickers! Some of these have incredible views and include communal use of small tracts of indigenous forest. But, at the end of the day, one is restricted to a small piece of land (measured in square metres instead of hectares!) and there are limitations to the freedom of expression and movement through voluntary subjugation to the dictates of a “body corporate”. Had we wanted this, we could simply have relocated to the outskirts of Cape Town.
So, the solution appeared to be a smallholding that had the right mix of indigenous flora, with enough space to breathe and sufficient autonomy but with acceptable security and at least Eskom power.
Well, we may just have found it! A 4.2ha property 5km from Plettenburg Bay; down a 400m gravel road. It has its own piece of >3ha of indigenous forest and fynbos and a 1,200 m2 piece of cleared land in front of the house, absolutely perfect for a large herb and vegetable garden and there is plenty of space for fruit trees along the driveway. There is a charming, large, well-maintained 3-bedroomed house on the property and a 2-bedroomed cottage in the indigenous forest, complete with tame loeries that appear every morning for their breakfast of fruit. Rainwater is collected in 6 large tanks but Eskom power is connected. Grey water is collected and can then be pumped onto the vegetable garden. Views are of the distant mountains, covered in pine forests, our own valley filled with indigenous forest and neighbouring dairy farms. None of the surrounding farmland may be subdivided or developed, as it is outside of the urban limits. There is space to breathe, space to develop and space to grow our dream. And, best of all, it is considerably cheaper than the asking price for our little “yuppy-pad” in Cape Town! Now, all that remains is to very rapidly conclude the sale of our Cape Town property and to make an offer. Even if we miss out on this property, we have been able to clearly articulate what we are looking for and we have seen that what we are looking for does indeed exist at a reasonable price.
This all very exciting! Our dream is finally starting to take shape.
Next: Creating My Own Reality
Friday, February 5, 2010
Update
This week’s blog post will not contain any self-indulgent philosophical musings! Somehow I’m in more of an action-oriented mood at the moment rather than in a reflective, navel-gazing mood. So I have decided to simply write a short update of the progress toward the realization of our forest dream.
We leave tomorrow for Plettenburg Bay where we will be staying in the holiday home of an ex-colleague for 8 days. However this is no holiday, but rather a business trip! We will be spending the time visiting umpteen properties in the Garden Route, which we have pre-selected as a short-list during hours of Internet research. We have several appointments set up with estate agents (usually a sub-section of humanity that I avoid at all costs!) We will also be catching up with several contacts we have made in the Garden Route over the past few years, as we believe that we need to find a way to tap into the social network there. This will enable us to be “in the know” with respect to finding possible property solutions that may work for us. Amongst others, we will be meeting with various people who opted out of the corporate world to create a self-sustaining lifestyle in the Garden Route and it should be interesting to learn from their experiences.
At this point we aren’t sure whether we may indeed find the perfect place for us next week (in which case we will sign an offer to purchase) or whether we will merely get a better idea of what is out there and at what price. We may simply find a rental property for now and then find the perfect property to purchase once we have been living there for a while. The perfect home will either have indigenous forest on the property or will border on the state-owned indigenous forest. It should have a water source and should have sufficient land for the growing of our own food. If there is a dwelling on the property that would be good, but if we find the perfect land without a dwelling, we will rent somewhere close by while we build our own home.
Our house in Cape Town is just about sold; however we are waiting to hear about bond approval in one case, and the property of prospective buyers being sold first, in another case. Once we return to Cape Town, we will be selling my partner’s car (we have a buyer), buy our pick-up and start planning the big move.
So, after a month of relaxation and relative peace-and-quiet, it’s all happening now, which is very exciting and also quite intimidating. However, we continue to follow the dictates of our hearts and it all feels just right.
I’ll be back in a week’s time, hopefully with some good news that will take us several steps closer to our dream!
Lisa
Next: Paradise Found!
We leave tomorrow for Plettenburg Bay where we will be staying in the holiday home of an ex-colleague for 8 days. However this is no holiday, but rather a business trip! We will be spending the time visiting umpteen properties in the Garden Route, which we have pre-selected as a short-list during hours of Internet research. We have several appointments set up with estate agents (usually a sub-section of humanity that I avoid at all costs!) We will also be catching up with several contacts we have made in the Garden Route over the past few years, as we believe that we need to find a way to tap into the social network there. This will enable us to be “in the know” with respect to finding possible property solutions that may work for us. Amongst others, we will be meeting with various people who opted out of the corporate world to create a self-sustaining lifestyle in the Garden Route and it should be interesting to learn from their experiences.
At this point we aren’t sure whether we may indeed find the perfect place for us next week (in which case we will sign an offer to purchase) or whether we will merely get a better idea of what is out there and at what price. We may simply find a rental property for now and then find the perfect property to purchase once we have been living there for a while. The perfect home will either have indigenous forest on the property or will border on the state-owned indigenous forest. It should have a water source and should have sufficient land for the growing of our own food. If there is a dwelling on the property that would be good, but if we find the perfect land without a dwelling, we will rent somewhere close by while we build our own home.
Our house in Cape Town is just about sold; however we are waiting to hear about bond approval in one case, and the property of prospective buyers being sold first, in another case. Once we return to Cape Town, we will be selling my partner’s car (we have a buyer), buy our pick-up and start planning the big move.
So, after a month of relaxation and relative peace-and-quiet, it’s all happening now, which is very exciting and also quite intimidating. However, we continue to follow the dictates of our hearts and it all feels just right.
I’ll be back in a week’s time, hopefully with some good news that will take us several steps closer to our dream!
Lisa
Next: Paradise Found!
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